Balance…..

We have recently had our second baby. Now we have our little boy and baby girl.

My hubby and I could not be happier. These last few weeks have been kind of intense though. We had to get oral surgery done for our son and coordinate everything within a week after our daughter was born.

Did I mention our son is 3? After we went in to get this done why do 2 of his crown s fall out!?

We were told by the dentist that he may have breathed the tooth into his lungs and we had to go to the ER for an X ray! We were still worried and this came the day we finally got confirmation that our daughter did NOT need to be hospitalized, as we had to do Billirubin test because she was yellow and the test confirmed she was jaundice 😦

We got great news that day pound little Sabine was healthy and did not need to be hospitalized but we had to go-to the ER for our son.

Thankfully my mom was visiting, shes been here to try and help out. So we were able to drop off the baby on the way to the ER.

After about 3 hrs of waiting and talking to the doctor we get confirmation. Only one crown was swallowed nothing was aspirated into his lungs. THANK YOU BABY JEEBUS!!!

So we are told to keep an eye on his teeth but our poor baby can’t eat without being in pain so we push up his follow up and go talk to the dentist. Now we are told that pulling his two teeth would be the best option. By this point our poor son us traumatized when it comes to doctors, hospitals and dentists. He screams whenever we go anywhere that looks like any of the above.

Mind you in the past few weeks he has visited me at the hospital twice, we have gone to the dentist the pediatrician once for him and once for his sister, he has had dental surgery, and has been to the ER as well. My poor baby boy is so over it.

Gratitude

I have been trying to be aware and make an effort in keeping my perspective rooted in gratitude. I have so very much to be grateful for,a beautiful healthy baby girl. Along with a handsome curious boy that is our joy. A wonderful husband that always puts us first no matter what. My amazing hubby makes sure I take care of myself when I don’t “have time” or the inclination to do so.

I have so much too be grateful for I know this…. but sometimes just sometimes it can be hard to always BE grateful. Especially when you’re exhausted and experiencing anxiety or depression. This pregnancy has presented itself with the lovely bouquet of baby blues which are definitely exacerbated by the lack of sleep that a newborn brings. All of this was a big surprise, as I was blissfully unaware of postpartum depression with my son’s pregnancy.

When I do have lows I do try to realign myself as soon as I can. Taking a walk or a shower as those are in short supply when I’m running around after my newborn as well as trying to keep my toddler from being upset because he’s jealous of the baby in the house and of course trying to keep the house clean. Having financial issue’s is also a huge stressor. But thankfully I have a family that I can lean on with all of this. I know I do and yet we are still trying to do everything we can so we do not burden others. I know it takes a village and I TRULY understand that now. But we do not want to burden anyone if we don’t have too.

I have anxiety and worries brought on by postpartum depression but my amazing husband has Generalized Anxiety on an everyday basis and because this pregnancy has been so difficult for me it has definitely heightened his anxiety. He has the weight of the world on his shoulders.

When I go spinning into a worry spiral, he is my anchor and brings me back down to reality. He is my knight in shining armor. Not because he saved me from someone. But because he saved me from myself, and he did it by giving me back hope and the belief that things do workout. Ever since I embraced that belief wholeheartedly with him as my partner in life everything HAS WORKED OUT, shocking but true. Not that we haven’t had issues and problems but we bulldoze forward….ALWAYS. Thankfully everything has worked out, which is what I try to remember.

Through this rollercoaster ride called life. I try to always remember that I have someone that is so much more, he is my soulmate, my best friend, and my partner in thus journey. This beautiful human being has given me a family and a home, I lived my life like I really had nothing to lose up until him. Now I have so much that I could not bear to lose. As long as my family is okay everything else will fall into place, I just need to remember that. They are what remind me to be grateful because after all I this is MY FAMILY, after 40 years of existence I have found my happiness and could not be more grateful.